Monday, January 07, 2008

Gobshite Gongs for 2007

The vote has been counted in a (Kenyan) democratic process and here are the results:

Best Individual Gobshite: a dead heat between John Deasy & Pat Magner, both chosen for the same reason - Sabotage.
Deasy famously sought to undermine Enda Kenny’s leadership in the run-up to the general election, to the delight of a media which was already generally sceptical about the Mayoman’s credentials to be Taoiseach.
Deasy’s reward has been to find himself consigned to the back bench of the back benches where he can nurse his family chip-on-the-shoulder while watching the new FG intake, e.g. Hayes, Reilly, Varadkar etc, eat his political lunch. His best move now would probably be to throw his hat into the ring for leadership of the PDs (Politically Destitute).

Magner had retired as Labour Party National Organiser in 2006 but, in the run-up to the election, became a bit of a media whore, passing no open microphone without taking the opportunity to denounce labour’s agreed electoral strategy (the Mullingar accord) and tout the keeping open of the FF option. A delighted media was able to use this to continue pressing Pat Rabbitte, at great length, on the FF question in every interview rather than allowing him to promulgate Labour policies. Unlike Deasy, one of Magner’s primary objectives was actually achieved with the post-election resignation of party leader Pat Rabbitte.

It appeared to be the case that Messrs Deasy and Magner would prefer to see their respective parties fail in the elections rather than have their leaders succeed. Certainly, neither sought to enhance the prospects of the Rainbow Coalition which, in the event, was only a handful of seats short of the target.

Best Gobshite Group: Willie O’Dea & his eFFin’ Shannon Rebels.
What have Willie and the Grand Old Duke of York got in common? They’re both military men of some stature, each with an army of broadly similar size and both favour a particular type of military manoeuvre.
However, Willie is the only one of the pair with a magnum: “I only agreed to pose with the magnum because I thought they were talking about a feckin’ ice-cream.”

Best Media Gobshite: Aengus Fanning of the Sindo.
Aengus has long been known as a bit of a ladies man, conquests are rumoured to include Ann Harris, Sinead O’Connor and Mary Coughlan. That aging BMW convertible, letting his long locks blow in the wind, must be a bit of a babe magnet. There was never any public indication that he might swing both ways.
Then he was photographed strolling along the canal bank with Bertie Ahern and suddenly it was splashed all over the Sindo.
The love affair continues, with Bertie pouring his little heart out in regular instalments in the Sindo - he’s almost qualified to join the incestuous little in-house coterie of “Sindo Celebs”.
What I haven’t figured out is why the Sindo wanted payment by way of stamp duty reform. Would Sir Anthony be buying or selling?