The "Fourth Way"

Francois Bayrou, the centrist candidate, finished in a creditable third place with 19% of the vote in the first round of this year’s Presidential Election in France. He was duly eliminated, leaving the field to the eventual second round winner Nicolas Sarkozy and runner-up Segolene Royal.

After the first round eliminations, Bayrou was naturally courted by both Sarkozy and Royal in the hope that he would encourage his considerable support from the first round to switch their allegiance in the second round. Interestingly, this courtship included participation by Royal in a TV debate with Bayrou about a week before the second round vote. Sarkozy turned down an invitation to a similar debate: “the team finishing third doesn’t get to play in the final” was his response.

What was interesting about Bayrou’s position following his elimination was his inability to fully endorse either candidate. It was quite clear that he didn’t like Sarkozy, regarding him as a divisive right-wing figure, although he would have supported many of that candidate’s policy proposals to reform work practices and the public services in France. Bayrou ultimately confirmed that he wouldn’t be voting for Sarkozy. On the other hand, while Bayrou appeared to get on well personally with Royal, he pointed out that many of her proposed policies were exactly what France did not need, both in terms of protective employment policies and expansion of France’s already over-burdensome public sector.

One Royal proposal was to make the state responsible for provision of creche facilities to enable parents to work. Bayrou pointed out that this would require the setting up of a whole new bureaucracy employing many thousands of civil servants and increasing the reach of the nanny state, with associated increased costs for the public purse.

Ultimately, Bayrou made no recommendation to his supporters who seem to have split reasonably evenly between the remaining two contenders. Bayrou is forming a new centrist political party, Le Mouvement Démocrate, so may well be a significant force in French domestic politics in the future.

Bayrou’s dilemma in choosing between two candidates is typical of what we’re faced often with in elections; the leftist parties promote caring social policies which include state monopolies, employment protections etc - policies that are now proven to be economically unsustainable (unless you‘ve got massive oil reserves or some other form of inherited wealth), while right-wing free-market economics have been proven to be successful but seem to come attached to parties and politicians who are somewhat short of the mark when it comes to societal and social considerations. It’s that clash between whether you live in a society or an economy when, in fact, you want the best elements of both.

Here’s my proposal as to how to tackle the dilemma.
Among the main functions of government are (a) how you raise money (b) how you spend money and (c) how you determine the amount of money you need to raise.

You allocate to the right-wingers all those cabinet seats associated with Finance, Business/Trade regulation, Employment Law, Infrastructure etc and you allocate to the left-wingers the major social spending departments e.g. Health, Education and Welfare.

The only real negotiation that needs to take place annually between the two sides is “How big is the pot of money required?”

Once this is agreed, it’s up to the right-wingers to regulate the marketplace anyway they like in order to raise the required finance, without interference from the left-wingers.

The left-wingers can then decide how they will prioritise the spend between and within their respective Departments, without interference from the right-wingers.

This system does away with the need for “collective cabinet responsibility”, which requires every minister to express support for every government policy. The situation would be made quite clear to the public and the media.

Thus a left-wing minister would be able to express criticism of some employment or taxation law, but point out that, under the agreed rules, this was beyond his/her control. Likewise, a right-wing minister could criticise some new welfare or health programme but point out the same limitations.

Naturally, one would hope that a strong leader of such a government would ensure some level of cohesion between the members of the team, whether left or right wing, and that measures would be debated and enjoy somewhat wider cross-cabinet support than might be implied above. But it would allow individual ministers to dodge more media bullets than is currently the case. And that just might allow them to get on with their jobs in a more productive and effective manner.

Bertiegate and the silence of the opposition

Last October, Michael McDowell assured the country that he had seen the relevant documentation and was satisfied as to Bertie Ahern’s personal finance bona fides.

This assurance from our Minister for Justice shot the horse out from under the opposition and probably contributed to the rise in support for FF in the polls and the corresponding demise in the fortunes of the opposition in those same polls.

Who would blame Messrs Kenny & Rabbitte from treading very carefully this time - they have no idea when McDowell will suddenly make another declaration of faith in Bertie, based on files and documents which only the great man himself has seen. “I know what I know” is a very hard claim to rebut in any forensic way and McDowell and his PDs have done so many about-turns that you never know what’s coming next.

The opposition are far wiser to let the media and, for the moment, the PDs, do the running on Bertiegate. McDowell and Ahern are currently on the BBQ, why would anyone need to join them there?

Footnote: Aired by Pat Kenny on his Today programme on RTE.

Sauve qui peut!

“Sauve qui peut” is the French expression that means “every man for himself”. Its literal translation is an order to “save (yourself) who(ever) can”.

On the day of the second round of the French elections, this seems an appropriate description for what emerged from the Progressive Democrats in Dublin today. They seem to have discovered on the doorsteps that the founding rationale for the Progressive Democrat party was probity in public life, rather than a commitment to right wing economics. While their public representatives appear to have long forgotten this in their lust for power, many of their supporters clearly haven’t.

There is a dawning realisation in the PD parliamentary party that a return to power seems highly unlikely for the current FF/PD coalition, based on all the recent opinion poll findings. Fianna Fail may well have a number of coalition options after the elections, but the PDs simply won’t be able to supply sufficient seats to make up the other part of a coalition with an overall majority. This realisation, combined with the fact that McDowell’s sustained “slump coalition” jibes have effectively ruled out participation in any alternative coalition, has finally convinced the sitting PD TDs that saving their own individual skins is now the only electoral objective on 24th May.

The party’s only real consideration this weekend has been to decide on the course of action which is likely to inflict on themselves the least incremental damage. Hence, the decision to stay in Government but demand that the Taoiseach provide a full explanation with regard to his housing transaction. The split between PD Dublin and rural TDs was also highlighted by the very different presentation from Michael McDowell and Tom Parlon. The former said that a full explanation was required if the Taoiseach expected to present himself to the electorate in three weeks time, while the latter was merely inviting the Taoiseach, if he felt like it, to clarify matters.

At a press PD press conference before the 2002 general election, when the opinion polls were predicting meltdown for that party, a comedy TV programme planted a “journalist” who asked Micheal McDowell if they would be changing the name of the party after the election. A clearly puzzled McDowell asked the journalist to clarify what she meant. “ To the Progressive Democrat” replied the journalist - a title which would indicate that they’d been reduced to a single TD. In fairness to McDowell, he got the joke and laughed loudly and genuinely.

I retain the hope that they will have cause to change the name of the party after May 24th 2007.

Retrospective Legislation

Whenever a loophole in the law is discovered and closed, we are routinely assured that it is not possible to change the law retrospectively.

Thus chancers and tax dodgers who have availed of such loopholes get to keep the benefits they’ve managed to extract from the system - whether that gets them off a drink-driving charge or avail of huge but unintended tax reliefs.

However, when it comes to political bribes, there seems to be no such problem with making legislation retrospectively effective. Thus Fianna Fail can finally unveil their stamp duty proposals and increased mortgage interest reliefs for first time buyers, both backdated. Fianna Fail promises that both these measures will be given retrospective effect if the party is returned to power.

This isn’t the first time that FF has pulled such a stunt on behalf of its supporters. Back when Bertie was Finance Minister in the early 1990s, the Revenue Commissioners were pursuing Ken Rohan for a BIK tax assessment of over £1m. Not only did Bertie introduce an amendment in the Finance Bill which removed the particular BIK liability, he also backdated the effect of that amendment for a period of 12 years.

Rohan was able to tear up the Revenue bill, and it was later confirmed that Rohan was the only person in the country to apply for relief under that tax provision. No one should assume that regular political donations had anything to do with the then Minister for Finance’s consideration in this case.

The bookies win again.

The bookies were cracking open the champagne tonight as they calculated their ante post gains on the withdrawal of longtime short-odds favourite Teofilo from the 2000 Guineas at Newmarket next Saturday.

I, on the other hand, was crying in my beer as I calculated my lost winnings on this racing certainty. I had €35 @ 16/1 on Jim Bolger’s colt to win the Guineas, the bet placed before he won the Group 1 National Stakes at the Curragh last year. After that victory his ante-post odds were cut to as little as 7/4.

Bolger had reported that the horse suffered a minor training setback in recent weeks, but had expressed confidence, until today, that the horse would be right for the big race.

Not my week with the long-term bets, I had €10 @ 15/1 on Man Utd to win the Champions League, but they were unceremoniously dumped out last night by a much better team. That was another good night's work for the bookies, I suspect.

Just as well I never expected to make my fortune at the bookies expense.

AC Milan 3 - Man UTD 0

Here endeth the lesson! All the hype about the quality of English football with three of the four semi-final qualifiers in the Champions League was blown away by the contrast between AC Milan and Man Utd.

All the hype about the brilliance of Man Utd, following their quarter-final 7-1 defeat of Roma and their resilient comeback in the first leg of the semi-finals to win it 3-2, seemed totally misplaced.

Last night Man Utd was given a lesson in football by AC Milan who totally outclassed their English opponents. The final 3-0 result could have been worse for United who hardly looked like scoring, while Milan oozed class and might have had several more goals. It wasn’t just football skills, Milan’s “aging squad” worked harder individually and gelled better as a team than their english counterparts.

This was a completely one-sided match and the winners must be long odds-on to beat Liverpool in the final.

Eamon Dunphy and John Giles on the RTE panel could hardly hide their delight at being proven right in their assessment of Ronaldo’s honesty and commitment.

Is the Health System defrauding the VHI?

On Thursday last, the Irish Independent reported that hospital consultants earned €237m from VHI alone in the past year.

The previous week, the Comptroller & Auditor General reported that private patients occupy more than the stipulated 20% of beds in public hospitals. On RTE radio, a spokeswoman for the IHCA offered one possible explanation for the excess private patients: it appears to be the practice in some hospitals to ask patients in A&E if they had private health insurance. If the answer is yes, the patient is asked to sign a claim form and is then categorised as private rather than public patient.

Presumably the purpose and result of this practice is to allow both the hospital and a consultant to bill the health insurer for accommodation and medical services provided.

I have been a PSRI payer and a VHI subscriber for over 30 years. I am entitled to a wide range of medical services as a public patient. If I present to A&E with a problem and am subsequently admitted to a public ward, I expect that this will be covered by my PRSI entitlements. If all I receive is public patient treatment, I should not be expected to use my VHI cover to pay for this. If I opt for a private or semi-private room, the hospital itself may justify seeking payment from VHI, but why should VHI pay the consultant who would be treating me regardless of which bed option I choose?

If hospitals and consultants are operating the system in this manner, then surely it may constitute a fraud against the VHI and its premium paying members? The nursing home fraud is currently being resolved, will VHI members soon be getting refund cheques courtesy of the Dept of Health?

Clearly if both hospitals and consultants were only paid by VHI for genuinely private treatment, the cost of health insurance would fall dramatically, the cost of risk equalisation would greatly reduce and the health insurance market could be opened up for real competition and product innovation.

VHI needs to clarify exactly what it pays on its members behalf and advise us on how to treat claim forms presented for signature in hospitals.

What would old Mr Brennan say?

Trevor Brennan has been banned for life from playing rugby after being found guilty of assaulting an Ulster supporter at a Heineken Cup game last January.
Brennan was also been fined €25,000 by the European Rugby Cup (ERC), ordered to pay €5,000 compensation to the fan and to pay the costs of convening the hearing. Brennan also received lifetime ban on participation in any capacity in tournaments organised by ERC.

Western society has systematically demonised physical violence of any sort while, at the same time, invoking the right to free speech to permit verbal abuse of an increasingly offensive nature, confined only by certain racist or sexist limitations. What's deemed mere "Vulgar Abuse" is not amenable to any remedy through law of slander.

Trevor Brennan has received a very heavy penalty for assaulting an Ulster fan, Patrick Bamford, at a rugby match last January. Brennan claims that the fan insulted his mother, Bamford claims that he only insulted Brennan’s pub. What’s interesting is that Bamford regards this as completely normal and acceptable within the confines of a sports ground, but wouldn’t dare offer the same abuse to Brennan face-to-face in the street or in a bar. He would fear the consequences that his actions were clearly inviting.

Where is the natural justice in a situation where someone with a quick mouth can verbally assault another person without fear of retribution? Nature has it’s own way of balancing talents and allowance should be made for the circumstances in each individual case. I’ve no doubt that Brennan did hear his mother being called a whore, but perhaps he ended up hitting the wrong Ulster supporter.

Trevor Brennan should have exercised more restraint in the situation, but he can also claim, in mitigation, that he was provoked. His punishment, including a lifetime ban from involvement in any capacity in ERC competitions, seems excessive.

Mr Bamford will probably be a bit more circumspect in offering his opinions at future matches. It may be no harm if he, and the myriad other fans of all sports who feel free to hurl abuse at players and rival fans, remembers the old Irish adage: “Is minic a bhris béal duine a shrón”. (a man's mouth often broke his nose)

Bertiegate & CAB

What would the Criminal Assets Bureau (CAB) make of the emerging facts and allegations concerning the sequence of events which are now being generically referred to as “Bertiegate”?

The claim that our then Minister for Finance was operating on a cash-only basis for several years in the late 1980s and early 1990s.
CAB would identify this as a standard ploy to remove any risk of creating a money trail which might subsequently be used to expose corrupt payments and their source. In The Sopranos, Tony Soprano routinely kept large quantities of cash concealed in his garden compost container. Bertie supposedly kept his in a safe somewhere an claims to have saved £50k in cash which ultimately went to the purchase of his house.

Michael Wall was the owner of the house.
Wall was accompanied by Celia Larkin in viewing the house before he bought it.
In December 1994, he gave Celia Larkin Stg£30k for refurbishment expenses (on a 3 year-old house) and stamp duty(?).
Then Michael Wall made a will leaving the house to Bertie Ahern, even though he himself was married with a family.
CAB might conclude that Michael Wall was, in fact, acting as agent for Bertie Ahern who may have always been the beneficial owner of the house, even though it was purchased in Wall’s name. The making of the will in favour of Ahern would seem to be a significant pointer in this direction.
Purchasing assets with hot cash using a third party to front the transaction and then buying the asset back in the name of the real owner, using a legitimate mortgage is also a standard mechanism for covering the expenditure of hot money.

That Bertie’s dig-out was a whip-round among personal friends.
NCB MD Padraig O’Connor, who contributed £5k, has denied this version of events. According to O’Connor he was asked by Des Richardson for a political contribution towards the running costs of Ahern’s constituency office. Yet this money turns up as part of Bertie’s own personal cash hoard.
CAB might point out that confusing party funds with personal monies appears to have been a trait among senior members of Fianna Fail at that time - Charles Haughey, Ray Burke, Padraig Flynn to name but a few.

The claim attributed to Garda Fallon that Bertie Ahern carried a briefcase full of cash, earlier withdrawn from a Dublin bank by Celia Larkin, to Manchester in 1994.
CAB might point out that sending cash round in circles is a classic part of the money laundering cycle. You give money to an offshore third party, sometimes a bank, who then lends it back to you. If queried, you have an explanation as to where the money came from, but the lender is outside the jurisdiction and not amenable to questioning by the authorities.

Clamping in Dun Laoghaire

Last sunday we bought a copy of the Sunday Independent on the Champs Elysees, it just shows how desperate you get for news from home even though you’ve only been away for a few days.

My blood pressure was raised by a report of Cllr Eugene Regan, Cathaoirleach of Dun Laoghaire Rathdown Co Co , defending the decision of County Manager Owen Keegan to introduce car clamping to the borough. Cllr Regan claims that the application of the clamping will be limited to persistent offenders and is quoted as saying that “this is entirely different to most systems of clamping, such as that applied in Dublin City, where one is clamped for every type of parking offence including overstaying or parking on double yellow lines.”

Dublin City clamping was introduced by the same Owen Keegan and, at the time, the public was assured that it would only be applied to cars which were illegally parked and causing an actual obstruction to traffic or access to premises. Cllr Regan may have forgotten, but the rest of us haven’t, just how quickly and completely that promise was dishonoured.

Residents of Dun Laoghaire have little confidence in the good intentions of either County Manager Keegan or Cathaoirleach Regan with regard to clamping, but only the latter is seeking election in three weeks time. He should bear that in mind.

Regan will get a piece of my mind if he calls canvassing before the election. He’s just moved himself right down the preference list on my voting paper.

I've blasted off a protest letter to the Sindo.

Footnote: Although the Sunday Independent failed to publish my excellent letter on the subject, their edition of 13th May reports that Councillor Regan has now done a complete about turn and is calling for a halt to the proposed introduction of clamping on June 1st. It's amazing what a little abuse on the doorsteps can achieve as he seeks votes in the upcoming election. Scary to think that this revolving man is Cathaoirleach of DLRCoCo.

Lamb of God

About a year ago I was watching an RTE fly-on-the-wall documentary about a variety of carers with their individual challenges and circumstances.

One situation was a single Cork man of about 60 who was looking after his physically disabled but reasonably mentally alert father. It was quite touching. but not without its moments of humour, some perhaps accidental.

In telling the story of the carer, the film-maker used a technique of having him talk to third parties about his father, rather than speaking direct to camera. One such scene had him in his local barbershop getting a haircut. The barber asks him questions about his father, including “and has he got a good appetite?”. “Oh yes”, replies the son, “he’d eat the hind leg of the Lamb of God”.
It was delivered and received in a completely deadpan way, suggesting that it’s a common expression in that part of Cork, though I’d never heard it before and thought it hilarious.

So when I saw this “Baby Jesus” saucisson on a recent visit to Paris, I had to buy it. I’d have bought more than one, but the wife was adamant that it would stink everything in the suitcase and I was lucky to get away with one. With the new security regulations, items such as this can’t be taken through in hand luggage.

I’m still on the lookout for a butcher brave enough to advertise “lamb of god”. I'll be stocking the freezer when I find one!

Fianna Fail Green Strategy omission

(A bit of recycling here, but appropriate given the topic, I hope).

There is a major omission from the Fianna Fail “Green Strategy” unveiled today, and I may be inadvertently responsible for that omission.

Rushing down Main St, Bray earlier this week, I bumped, literally, into Environment Minister Dick Roche who was rushing in the opposite direction. I noticed that he dropped something , but by the time I’d managed to pick it up and turn around, he’d vanished into the crowd on the street and I couldn’t locate him.

Subsequent examination of the document showed it to be a joint proposal from the Environment Minister and Transport Minister Martin Cullen to cut the pollution associated with air travel, a topic that is becoming popular with the media who, paradoxically, are probably among the worst offenders.

Background
The debate regarding emissions from air travel is hotting up, the latest development being the UK government imposition of a travel tax for all passengers. The phenomenal growth of low-cost carriers such as Ryanair and Easyjet has meant that such emissions are growing at an unprecedented pace, despite the introduction of more fuel-efficient aircraft. There are moves afoot for the EU to introduce similar measures on a Europe-wide basis.

In light of the open skies agreement between the EU and USA, ending the obligatory Shannon stopover for transatlantic flights and the threat to its historic economic benefits to the Mid-West Region, the Government needs to find a way to incentivise airlines to continue services to the region.

Aircraft burn a significant portion of their fuel load on take-off, and larger long-range aircraft with heavy fuel loads are particularly penalised in this way.

The Proposal
Move Shannon Airport to the Cliffs of Moher and, using a steam catapult system similar to that employed on aircraft carriers, launch aircraft off the cliff top and out over the Atlantic.

This should significantly reduce the amount of fuel burned in take-off with obvious benefits for associated emissions and operating costs. The new visitor centre would make a fine terminal building, while the car park is already big enough.

The US military have agreed, under strictest secrecy, to provide US navy equipment and qualified personnel to manage the launch and retrieval of commercial aircraft, subject to unrestricted access to the facility for their own unmarked aircraft.

The main challenge is the safety of aircraft landing on a much reduced airstrip. USN Special Adviser to the project, Rear Admiral Woody Bearschitz, is confident that his men can stop incoming aircraft short of the perimeter Liscannor-Doolin road and that the experience should not be too frightening for passengers: “About on a par with a standard Ryanair landing” was his assessment.

Attached is the detailed blueprint for the scheme. It’s on official stationery - trust me, there is a harp on the other side of the envelope. It has clearly received at least as much detailed consideration as many other major Government initiatives e.g. decentralisation.

Manchester United v. The Consultants

Watching Manchester United last night making a comeback to beat AC Milan 3-2, it struck me that strikers Rooney & Ronaldo are probably earning several times the annual salary of defenders Wes Brown and Patrice Evra. Not only is this state of affairs accepted as entirely logical and normal by the millions who watched the match, but also by Brown and Evra themselves!

I also watched, through my fingers, some of Monday night’s documentary on the Beaumont Hospital neurosurgeon (brain surgeon to you and me) Prof. Ciaran Bolger. I recalled the recent BBC series on the NHS with Gerry Robinson where orthopaedic surgeons doing hip and knee replacements were seen using hammers, literally, to put the new metal joints in place. The contrast in levels of surgical skill and patient risk is quite striking and raises the following question: why would you pay a neurosurgeon the same rate as a consultant performing much more routine procedures?

Surely the Dept of Health and the IHCA should be negotiating on the basis of skill level of the speciality rather than a blanket package where everyone is rewarded at the level of the top discipline? The HSE seems to be paying all our Browns and Evras at the same rate as our Rooneys & Ronaldos. Surely this is financial madness?

Footnote: Aired by Pat Kenny on his Today programme on RTE, yes today.

Crime & Punishment

Galway’s longest serving councillor Michael 'Stroke' Fahy was in Castlerea jail last night, starting his 12-month sentence for defrauding the County Council by having a fence built around his property at public expense. He was also fined €75,000, even though he had fully re-imbursed the council and made an additional donation to a local charity.

The court had agreed to briefly defer serving the committal warrant in order to allow Cllr Fahy time to make arrangements for his 96-year old mother with whom he shares a home. He has been her sole carer, his duties include getting up during the night to bring heer to the toilet.

The day before he was due to be jailed, Cllr Fahy was rushed to hospital suffering from blood pressure difficulties and later had a stent inserted at University College Hospital in Galway.

On April 11, he was transferred to a nursing home in Clarenbridge where he was later joined as a patient by his elderly mother. He was due to be discharged from the nursing home tomorrow, but yesterday afternoon the gardai arrived at the nursing home and took Cllr Fahy to Castlerea Prison.

At the time of his conviction, I was delighted that finally a politician was going to spend some time behind bars for having his fingers in the till. Even his nickname seemed to confirm that he'd been at it for years. However, the actress Jeananne Crowley featured on RTE’s Liveline, making an appeal that his jail sentence be deferred until his 96-year old mother had passed away. The old lady had been taken into a hospice in anticipation of his incarceration. Jeananne pointed out that the old lady might well be dead before Fahy is released and that it's inhumane to deprive her of her son, carer and home at this very advanced stage of her life.

Dammit, he’s an ex-Fianna Failer and it galls me to say it, but I have to agree with Jeananne. And if Mother Fahy dies while her son is in prison, both of them will have been punished in a way that doesn’t seem like proportionate justice.

Space Tourism

RTE Radio 1 news bulletin at 2.00pm today opened with an item about the return to earth of the Soyuz capsule carrying space tourist Charles Simonyi, who paid $25m for the two-week return trip to the International space station.

Simonyi is one of the Microsoft billionaires. To have such an item opening the news, I thought for a moment that something had gone wrong on the re-entry and, god forgive me, I thought “that’ll teach them”.

However, the item merely confirmed a safe landing by the Soyuz in Kazakhstan. There were a number of other domestic political stories which could have led the bulletin, I don’t understand what got this one promoted and caused my hopes to be raised for a couple of seconds.

Who's managing the Health Service?

It’s a basic truism of business that what you can’t measure you can’t manage.

A report by Comptroller & Auditor General John Purcell, resulting from a one-year inquiry as part of the financial audit of the Department of Health, on the contract which currently governs the work of consultants found that there was insufficient evidence to assess to what extent it was being implemented.

Indeed, there is no clarity as to how many hours per week they are obliged to work. The HSE claims 39 hours, the consultants claim 33 hours.

The report says there has been "no meaningful attempt to monitor the level of consultants' private practice for its impact on the fulfilment of the contractual commitment within public hospitals".

It also found that although there was "a belief among hospital managers that many consultants exceed their contractual commitment, this cannot be substantiated in the absence of reliable records". This may well be ass-covering by hospital managers. Who among them would be happy to admit that they have no idea what hours are being worked by the key group of employees supposedly under their command?

The Irish Medical Organisation, which represents 800 consultants, said that it welcomed the report, which "confirmed that serious difficulties are apparent in the management systems within our hospitals". It also said that the report "highlights the need for verification systems, which the IMO supports". Who believes these people?

Who is to blame here? Are the hospital managers completely incompetent or are the consultants completely unmanageable? Is the HSE capable of managing the change that is clearly necessary? Have the politicians the ability or the bottle to fix the problem? Where’s Gerry Robinson when we need him?

Virginia Tech Hero

April 16th 2007 was Yom Hashoah, Holocaust Remembrance Day and a national holiday in Israel.

On that day, Liviu Librescu was one of 32 people murdered at Virginia Tech by Cho Seung-Hui. He was shot through the door of his classroom, holding it shut while Cho was attempting to get in. However, Librescu managed to block the door long enough for his students to escape through the classroom windows

The irony is that Librescu was himself a Holocaust survivor, a Romanian jew, born in 1930, who had been interned in a labour camp and later deported to a ghetto.

You’d think he’d already been through enough shit to last anyone more than one lifetime, without finding himself having to make the ultimate sacrifice in his 77th year. RIP.

Meanwhile, the National Rifle Association has come up with the perfect answer to the lobby calling for greater gun control in the wake of this massacre. They cite the ban on carrying weapons on the Virginia Tech campus as the being real problem. If only the teachers and their students had been carrying weapons they could have stopped Cho earlier in his killing spree.

That answer displays the twisted logic of the NRA, an organisation that has a lot to answer for.

"Mickey Mouse" denial

Published in today’s Irish Times is the following denial that an IHCA representative described the proposed new consultant’s package as “mickey mouse”.

However, the transcript provided repeatedly refers to “a job without a contract or a salary” and seems like an even dafter claim. Perhaps it reveals just how thin is the air on Planet IHCA.

Madam, - I refer to the report in last Wednesday's edition of the IHCA press conference, in which I am quoted as describing a proposed salary of up to €205,000 a year as "Mickey Mouse". Mary Rafferty, in her column of April 19th, while not referring to me by name, again credits the IHCA with holding the same view regarding the proposed salaries which, incidentally, range from €160,000 to €205,000.I was surprised to read your report which credited me with a statement which I did not make. For the record, the transcript of the press conference records my contribution as follows:
"Any young person that has spent six years at school slogging to get into medical school, spent six or seven years at medical school, and then gone abroad and trained for seven years to come back to an offer of a job that does not have a contract, that doesn't have a salary, I mean it's laughable.
"No one in this room would take a job without a contract and a salary. They're asking people to take jobs on contracts for that don't exist on salaries that don't exist and it's absurd.
"I've worked abroad, I've worked abroad [ sic] and I know how people think. I've worked in England and I've worked in America and I know how people think and they'll come back and see this as Mickey Mouse. Anyone who's working in a big centre. . ."
I do not expect that this letter will correct the damage that has been done to the reputation of the IHCA and consultants in general as a result of the widespread inaccurate coverage of our press conference, but I do hope that it will set the record straight for future reference. - Yours, etc,
Dr JOSH KEAVENY, Consultant Anaesthetist, Beaumont Hospital Dublin 9.

I've sent the following response.

Madam - Today you publish a denial by IHCA representative Dr Josh Keaveny that he ever described the proposed salary for the new consultants contract as “mickey mouse“.
However, the transcript provided in support of this shows him to have made repeated references to “a job without a contract or a salary”and this was a situation he considered to be “mickey mouse”.

If these utterances were supposed to represent a mature IHCA understanding of the situation and what would be on offer, then clearly that organisation needs to employ, as a matter of urgency, some professional support to conduct future negotiations. Otherwise, we’ll continue to go nowhere and hard-working, dedicated consultants will continue to wonder how they could have become so universally vilified. Yours etc.

Is Sinn Fein abstentionism a legitimate political strategy?

I sometimes get phone calls or correspondence from fellow cranks, following publication of a letter in one of the newspapers.

My recent go at the Shinners in the Examiner has generated a couple of letters from a Dublin man who claims that Sinn Fein MPs who are elected as abstentionists would violate their electoral mandate if they took their seats in Westminster.

Technically correct perhaps, but I don’t accept that abstentionism is a legitimate political tactic in Northern Ireland since the constitutional position was settled by the Good Friday Agreement in 1997.

The reality of abstentionism is that it totally disenfranchises those electors who voted for another party or didn’t choose to exercise their right to vote.

In the 2005 Westminster elections, Sinn Fein got 24.3% of the total vote in Northern Ireland, winning 5 of the 18 seats in the province.

West Belfast: Gerry Adams won 70% of the votes cast. Turnout was 66%, so he was elected by 46% of the total electorate.

Mid-Ulster: Martin McGuinness won 48% of the votes cast. Turnout was 73%, so he was elected by 35% of the total electorate.

Newry & Armagh: Conor Murphy won 41% of the votes cast. Turnout was 71%, so he was elected by 29% of the total electorate.

West Tyrone: Pat Doherty won 39% of the votes cast. Turnout was 72%, so he was elected by 28% of the total electorate.

Fermanagh & South Tyrone: Michelle Gildernew won 38% of the votes cast. Turnout was 71%, so she was elected by 27% of the total electorate.

In summary, even assuming that everyone voting Sinn Fein supported the policy of abstention (which I personally doubt) , Sinn Fein cannot claim to have received endorsement of this strategy by a majority of the electorate in any of the 5 constituencies above. Indeed, only Gerry Adams comes anywhere close to that position, the other four MPs can only claim support of one-third or less of their constituents. Meanwhile, in each of these constituencies the majority of the electorate now have no representation in Westminster.

QED

Consultants Dispute

Letter published in today's Irish Times

Madam, - In describing as "Mickey Mouse" the new consultants' contract on offer from the HSE, an IHCA representative has finally shown us what this dispute is really about (The Irish Times, April 18th). On Tuesday, RTÉ's Morning Ireland pointed out that the basic salary now on offer was 50 per cent higher than that paid to consultants working in the UK National Health Service, a fact acknowledged by the IHCA representative on the programme.

The justification offered by spokesmen for the medical organisations for such very high salary levels, relative to UK peers, is that we want to attract and retain the best possible medical practitioners.

Are we expected to believe that all Irish consultants are sufficiently superior in quality to their British counterparts to justify such a huge salary differential? The vast majority are no better or worse than the average in the UK or any other European health service. The health service would probably be much better off if it could release the existing expensive consultants into full-time private practice and replace them with a new, more flexible and affordable workforce.

Every €10 million of salary cost will probably get us 25 to 30 existing consultants but would be sufficient to pay 40 to 45 consultants on the new contract, with extended hours and increased flexibility.

Replacing the existing crew would result in the loss of some experience and expertise, leading to some sub-optimal outcomes for patients. However, because we could afford to employ many more consultants, the resultant reduction in waiting lists and early intervention must greatly increase the prospects for those currently waiting months or years to see a consultant. - Yours, etc,

Mickey Mouse Money

On Thursday, the UK National Audit Office has revealed that NHS consultants there earned an average £110k (c. €162k) per annum for working an average 50.2 hour week in 2006.

This level of productivity has been criticised by the Commons Public Accounts Committee, to which the National Audit Office reports because NHS consultants were given a 25% salary increase in 2003 on the basis of increased productivity. However, in the interim their average weekly hours worked has actually decreased from 51.6 to 50.2.

Sir John Bourn, the Comptroller and Auditor-General and head of the National Audit Office, said: “Consultants deserve to be paid properly for the work that they do. However, the new contract was introduced to benefit not only consultants but patients and the health service in general".

In Ireland, the new HSE consultants public-only contract has a basic salary of €205k per annum for a 39-hour week, with a €20k on call allowance and a further €40k performance related bonus available. This is the package which has been rejected out of hand by the Irish Hospital Consultants Association and described as “Mickey Mouse”.

It's clearly time to stop playing Goofy and simply tell the IHCA to Donald Duck Off!

Footnote: Published as a letter in the Irish Independent 23/4/07, the Irish Examiner 25/4/07. A variant with a less frivolous ending published in the Irish Times 24/4/07

Alarming news.

Just listening to a radio ad for Eircom Phonewatch Home Alarms which tells me that 70% of burglaries happen when I’m at home doing the ironing (unlikely) or watching tv.

This had me scratching my head. Why would I bother buying an Eircom Phonewatch alarm if the likelihood is that I’ll be burgled while I’m at home with the alarm switched off?

Who’s writing these ads and, more importantly, who in Eircom is paying for them?

Another victim of the Mad Molecule Theory?

Off to Paris at end of next week with the ball & chain, partly to mark our 21st wedding anniversary. You’d serve a shorter sentence for mass murder - at least that what she claims.

This will entail a lot of walking, central Paris is deceptively large, so last Saturday I bought a new pair of walking shoes in anticipation. They felt fine strolling around inside the shoe shop, but the left shoe began to rub the back of my heel when I went for a real walk. So I adopted the classic strategy - put a band-aid on the part of the foot that’s rubbing and set about breaking in the shoes properly. Three or four 40-minute walking sessions later, the problem is solved and the offending shoe has been broken in.

But then I started wondering was it my foot that had been broken in and the shoe remained unaltered. Or was it a bit of both?

Inevitably this led to consideration of whether, through some strange form of osmosis, the outcome was a practical proof of Flann O'Brien's mad molecule theory, with my shoe now being part human heel and my heel being part shoe. And where are the molecules of the protective band-aid in the mix?

Note to self: wear a different pair of shoes tomorrow. And no band-aid.

Have you nothing smaller?

One service provided by Bank of Ireland constantly annoys me. When you use one of their ATMs it will always make up your withdrawal in the minimum number of notes possible - in other words, in the largest denominations possible. Thus, if you withdraw €200, you’ll get 4 x €50 notes. Not popular when you proffer one to pay €1.60 for a newspaper.

My brother works for that bank and, a couple of months ago, I told him of my irritation, contrasting it with experience in France where a similar €200 withdrawal would typically include some €20 & €10 notes.

Imagine my horror when he confessed that he is the cash management guru who devised and implemented this cash dispenser strategy. I gave him a piece of my mind about how customer-unfocused this strategy is. I could see from his reaction that he had no idea what I was talking about.

Now I’ve discovered that, at the end of March 2007, my brother addressed a European banking conference in London on this very topic, described as follows: “Optimising cash management at ATMs The replenishment of ATMs, and the cost of cash inside each machine, are two of the largest components of deployers’ overall costs. To what extent can cash management software improve operational efficiency?”
I haven’t ruled out fratricide if I find that continental banks start to follow his benighted example.

From stable to betting exchange

Jim Bolger’s Teofilo has been the short-priced ante-post favourite for the Newmarket 2000 Guineas for several months. Typically available at 5/4, his odds on Betfair betting exchange suddenly shot out to 10/1 for a short time yesterday. This was despite telephone confirmation yesterday morning to the Racing Post by Jim Bolger that the horse was fit and well and all systems were go for next month’s first colt’s classic of the season.

Most bookies immediately suspended betting on the Guineas, pending clarification from the stable as to the horse’s well-being.

Later in the day is was confirmed that the horse had suffered a slight setback. Jim Bolger issued a statement in the afternoon which said that "Teofilo has had a training setback. When trotted yesterday afternoon he showed slight discomfort. "As a result, his training will be restricted to walking and swimming for one week. Otherwise, he is fit and well and on target for his 2,000 Guineas tilt on May 5.”
It just shows you how quickly sensitive information gets from the stable to the betting exchanges.

Most bookies have now restored Teofilo to race favouritism, slightly lengthening his odds to between 6/4 & 2/1.

Hopefully someone snapped up that 10/1 on Betfair and will make a killing on race day. ’Cos I’ve backed Teofilo @ 16/1 for the Guineas - great odds but worth nothing if he doesn’t run.

The cost of Health

On RTE’s Morning Ireland today it was pointed out that the basic salary in the proposed new consultant contract, reported to be €205,000 plus up to 20% performance-related annual bonus, is 50% higher than the basic salary for consultants in the UK NHS, a figure that was not disputed by the IHCA representative.

However, later this morning the talks between HSE and the IHCA have broken down, with the IHCA reported by RTE as describing the contract and money of offer as “Mickey Mouse”.

Some weeks ago, RTE’s Fergal Bowers, an authoritative source on medical industrial relations, opined that existing consultants would be looking for a salary of nearer to €400k in order to agree the pay element of a new contract. The IHCA response today suggests that Mr Bowers is probably not too far off the mark.

The justification offered by spokesmen for the medical organisations for such very high salary levels, relative to UK peers, is that we want to attract and retain the best possible medical practitioners.

Are we, the ultimate paymasters of the consultants, expected to believe that the Irish consultants are superior in quality to their British counterparts? There might be 5% - 10% who genuinely are, but the vast majority will be no better or no worse than the average in UK or any other European health service.

The IHCA and the IMO are now undertaking a proactive campaign to discourage doctors in Ireland and abroad from applying for any of the new consultant posts, due to be advertised later this week.

Such activity should be classified as industrial action by these organisations on behalf of their members. Any refusal by existing consultants to cooperate with the new recruits should be used treated as a breach of existing contract and used as grounds for dismissal.

The reality is that we should be better off if we could shed the existing expensive consultants and replace them with a new, more flexible and affordable workforce.

Think of it this way: Every €10m in annual salary cost probably gets you 25 existing consultants but would pay for 50 new ones. The system will lose some experience and expertise in shedding the existing lot, leading to some sub-optimal outcomes from patients who are currently at the top of the queue. However, doubling the number of consultants, for the same money, means that the outcomes for a huge number of patients further down the queue will be significantly better.

Put simply, we could afford to employ many more consultants and the resulting reduction in waiting times means that patients will be seen much sooner and this early intervention must greatly increase the prospects for those currently waiting months or years to see a consultant. Naturally, this would have to be done as part of a much wider reform of the hospital service.

Footnote: Aired on RTE's Today with Pat Kenny show 18th April.

Those benefits of EBS mutuality

Although not a shareholder, I’ve been watching the EBS boardroom battle with a little added interest, as I worked for a couple of years with Ted McGovern, EBS Chief Executive, during his time with Bank of Ireland.

One item on Eithne Tinney’s protest agenda is Ted’s very generous remuneration and pension package. This aspect amused me because I always felt that Ted had something in common with Oscar Wilde: two men of simple taste - they only like the best. That’s an expensive habit, best if you can find someone else to fund it.

Press reports of the prolonged and contentious EGM, at which Tinney narrowly lost her bid to retain her board seat, include an attack from the floor on Senator Shane Ross, who has been orchestrating a “save Tinney” campaign, by one Mary Caffrey. She accurately described Senator Ross as “a self-serving, publicity-seeking individual, both as a journalist and a politician".

While the press reports correctly identify Mary as Ted McGovern’s wife, it’s not clear that this was revealed to the assembled members when she made her attack on Ross.

Expect to hear as little as possible from EBS for an extended period. Ted will batten down the hatches and wait for the storm to pass. Don’t expect any resignations, justifications or contrition.

Mother & Child rights

Aine Lawlor has been filling Marian Finucane’s RTE Radio 1 chair for the past two Saturdays. Last Saturday, one of the topics under discussion was the Natalie Evans/Howard Johnston case regarding the use of frozen embryos, recently decided by the European Court of Human Rights in favour of Mr Johnston’s request that the embryos be destroyed rather than implanted in Ms Evans.

In the course of the discussion Aine Lawlor made what seemed like an impassioned plea on behalf of Ms Evans. She talked of the natural yearning for a child of women in their mid-30s whose biological clock is ticking but who haven’t found any Mr Right as a long-term partner. Surely these women could be allowed to “adopt” those frozen embryos and give birth themselves?

Then, in yesterday’s Sunday Times, Brenda Power argued that the court decision is tantamount to allowing a man insist on an abortion where he has changed his mind about becoming a father. She clearly believes that Johnston should not have the right to prevent the implantation of the embryos by Ms Evans, allowing her the chance to become a single parent.

The case of Ms Evans is a particularly tough one, as she has made sterile by radiation treatment for cancer and will be unable to reproduce with another partner at a later stage.

However, in the whole media debate on this, I haven’t heard anyone question the automatic right of single women to bring children into the world without any sign of a long-term partner as father for the child. The assumption is that this is an unquestionable “woman’s right to choose”. What about the rights of the child?

The Government proposes to amend the constitution to specifically express the rights of the child. How will these rights intersect with “a woman’s right to choose” to have a baby in any circumstances that suit herself? In these politically times, who will represent the rights of the child in such debates?

Remember, remember

The current radio ad for Alzheimer’s Tea Day begins with the instruction to “Remember…”.

How appropriate. What was that about again?

Bertiegate revisited

The Sunday Independent is running a story this morning which claims that, in 1994, then Finance Minister Bertie Ahern carried a briefcase full of cash on a flight to the UK. The cash had been withdrawn from a Dublin bank the previous day by Celia larkin. The source of the story is supposedly a retired garda Martin Farrell who was Ahern’s driver in 1994. It’s claimed that he first approached Fine Gael’s Jim Higgins and Enda kenny in 2000, and subsequently repeated the accusations in a phone conversation with Higgins which was also heard by Jody Corcoran of the Sindo.

Higgins reported the conversations to the then Flood Tribunal but retired garda Fallon is refusing to make any statement to the Planning Tribunal.

This “exclusive” has all the hallmarks of a belated attempt by Fine Gael to sink Bertie in a sea of sleaze in the weeks before the election, having failed to nail him late last year over his loan/gift dig-out from a group of friends.

However, if the Criminal Assets Bureau was investigating this matter, they would have a hard time believing that the Minister for Finance operated on a cash basis for several years in the early 1990s and had no bank account of any sort at that time. Indeed, they would recognise this as possibly being a clever way of removing any risk of creating a money trail which might subsequently be used to expose corrupt payments and their source. In The Sopranos, Tony Soprano routinely kept large quantities of cash concealed in his garden compost container.

I don’t know what Bertie may or may not have been up to, but I personally don’t believe that the money he acknowledges receiving in mid 1990s was anything other than a gift. Eleven years later to categorise it as a series of small loans defies belief, but was an essential fig-leaf to explain why no tax had been paid on the gift. Indeed, Bertie’s PR people talked of his attitude that these were debts of honour which he had always wanted to repay.

This reminded me of Charlie Haughey under interrogation at the tribunal regarding his unpaid bad debt with AIB. He categorised it as a debt of honour but was challenged by the tribunal’s counsel as to why, in that case, he hadn’t paid it off after all these years. “I haven’t dishonoured it” retorted Haughey.

Clearly Fianna Failers take a Chinese view of appropriate timeframes.

Marketing in action

An exclusive photo from my bathroom. Spot the apparent contradiction on the Dove deodorant. Another marketing genius at work.

The Shinners fight back

In response to my letter proposing that Sinn Féin Mps should now take their seats in Westminster (see blog of 6th April), the following Sinn Féin response is published today in the Irish Examiner, under the heading Foreign parliament? No thanks

ON the off-chance that Peter Molloy was actually trying to make a serious argument (Irish Examiner letters, April 11), I would like to point out the following: Sinn Féin has agreed to enter a power-sharing government with unionists and others in order to deliver equal representation for Irish people in an Irish parliament. It has no desire or need to sit in a foreign imperialist parliament that goes to war at the drop of a hat, and which has never served the interests of the Irish people.

As abstentionist MPs from Westminster, Sinn Féin representatives have served their constituents well. Both the nationalist electorate and the failed SDLP candidates who desire the grandeur of Westminster are testimony to this. While Sinn Féin would never take its lead from what Mr de Valera did or did not do in the past, Mr Molloy should be aware that Dev’s hollow oath was taken as a means to take his party into an Irish parliament to serve Irish people, albeit a parliament that represented only part of the nation.

Far from Sinn Féin sitting in a foreign parliament which caused centuries of pain, destruction and division in Ireland, it is about to serve in the two existing Irish assemblies. From there, it will work to establish one true Irish parliament, which will serve all the people on this island equally. If Mr Molloy really wants to make a link between de Valera’s past and Sinn Féin today, then he should consider this: the one seat Dev could not capture in the past — West Belfast — is now a Sinn Féin stronghold. Mr Molloy can rest assured that Sinn Féin will succeed where Dev failed, when he abandoned the outstanding national issue in the past.

Finally, as a well-meaning gesture to Mr Paisley and unionism in general, is Mr Molloy prepared to ask his local TD to switch allegiance to the House of Commons as an act of good faith?

Cllr Kieran McCarthy, Sinn Féin, 89 Russell Heights, Cobh, Co Cork

My response, emailed today to the Examiner.

Sinn Fein Cllr Kieran McCarthy (Examiner Letters 14th April) dismisses my proposal that his party should take up their seats at Westminster. He asserts that Sinn Fein “has no desire or need to sit in a foreign imperialist parliament” and that “as abstentionist MPs from Westminster, Sinn Féin representatives have served their constituents well”. It seems that the “no surrender” mentality is alive and well in Cobh.

The Good Friday Agreement, democratically endorsed by the populations of both parts of this island, settled the constitutional status of Northern Ireland: it will remain part of the United Kingdom unless and until a majority of the people there vote to change that status. How then could Westminster be legitimately be described as a “foreign parliament” by elected Northern Ireland MPs? As for abstentionist Sinn Fein MPs serving their constituents well, how exactly are they serving their unionist constituents?

Representation is an essential ingredient of any democracy and elected representatives are supposed to serve all their constituents, not just the ones who voted for them. This is particularly important in the single-seat, first-past-the-post Westminster system. How are the interests of Northern Ireland farmers, business, fisheries etc represented by abstentionist MPs? In the Republic, we see how active are the lobby groups representing such interests when key ministerial decisions are being made in Brussels.

Cllr McCarthy asks if, as a well-meaning gesture to Mr Paisley and unionism in general, I’d be prepared to ask my local TD to switch allegiance to the House of Commons as an act of good faith? Happily, in the case of the 3 sitting Government TDs.

However, the proposal to grant Dail Eireann speaking rights to elected Northern Ireland MPs should not even be under consideration for MPs who refuse to exercise their speaking rights, on behalf of all their constituents, in the Parliament to which they have actually been elected.

Footnote: My respone published by the Irish Examiner 19th April.

What's sauce for the honkey...

Phone-in radio is the cheapest and lowest form of entertainment and one which demonstrates an absence of broadcasting imagination. If I had the power I’d close down RTE’s Liveline and ban the phone-in, other than for gardening queries. In the USA this format had created a number of so-called shock-jocks who get cranks and bigots calling in on all sorts of dodgy and sensitive topics.

One currently in the news, and I’d never heard of him until now, is Don Imus, whose CBS radio show is syndicated across the USA. His show is a major revenue generator for CBS and Imus himself earns about $10 million a year, according to the New York Times. He has recently signed a five-year contract extension.

Last week, watching a women’s college basketball game on TV, Imus referred to Rutgers University coloured players as "nappy-headed hos", a racial reference to whores.
Leading members of the black community including Rev. Al Sharpton and Rev Jesse Jackson have demanded that Imus be fired by CBS. "The comments of Don Imus were divisive, hurtful and offensive to Americans of all backgrounds," said presidential candidate Senator Barack Obama who recently promoted his book on Imus's show.

So far, CBS has resisted those demands for dismissal, but they have suspended the Imus show for two weeks.

I’d be happy if they fired Imus and any other shock-jocks out there stirring up rednecks, bigots and cranks. However, I’d be more impressed by black community leadership - Sharpton, Jackson, Obama & Co - if they were also calling for the dismissal of radio & TV executives and DJs who routinely play black gangsta rap which is dominated by the language of violence and misogyny e.g. women are routinely referred to as “bitches” and “hos”. What’s sauce for the honkey……

Time for Sinn Féin MPs to take their seats

Today is Good Friday and it’s exactly nine years, ecclesiastically speaking, since the signing of the Good Friday Agreement on 10th April 1998, a process that was boycotted by the DUP and Ian Paisley was heckled by loyalists at Stormont after the agreement was signed.

Who, then, would have envisaged a situation where the DUP would emerge as the leading Unionist party, where Ian Paisley would be First Minister-designate or, most spectacularly, he would be having last Wednesday's very publicly cordial meeting the Taoiseach at Farmleigh and delivering that extraordinary statement?

If the nationalist community in the North, and we in the South, needed a confidence-building measure from the DUP then surely Ian Paisley's visit last Wednesday was it in spades.
Let's hope that Gregory Campbell and Nigel Dodds start singing from the same hymn sheet as their party leader.

Much of the long delay in implementing the Good Friday agreement has been caused by the tactics of Sinn Fein and the IRA who sought to avoid meeting key obligations at every turn. They have been forced, slowly but surely, to decommission IRA weapons and latterly to recognise the legitimacy of the PSNI.

Republicans abandoned the armed struggle, not because of moral considerations or a dawning abhorrence of violence and murder. Rather it was a pragmatic decision taken after calm and measured analysis which convinced them that they were more likely to achieve their ultimate goal of a united Ireland through political rather than military means, and that the armed struggle was now retarding their advancement on the political front.

The problem with such pragmatism is that in five, ten or 20 years time, should this analysis become discredited, there is no "moral" barrier to prevent republicans taking another pragmatic decision to return to the bomb and bullet.

Sinn Fein must take another confidence-building step to reassure the unionist community of their bona fides as committed democrats. Elected Sinn Fein MPs must take their seats in the House of Commons and represent all their constituents properly. Currently, unionists electors in Sinn Fein seats have been deprived of their constitutional rights to representation in Parliament by this ongoing Sinn Fein boycott.

If de Valera could take the oath of allegiance, then so can Messrs Adams and Co. It will certainly expose Sinn Fein to some abuse from both sides of the political divide in Northern Ireland. That is a price Mr Paisley has clearly been willing to pay.

Footnote: The section in italics published as a letter in the Irish Independent. & the Irish Examiner.

Is it me?

What a laugh to hear that 6 Govt ministers were stuck in a lift at Government Buildings for about 40 minutes yesterday. Those involved were Mary Harney, Mary Coughlan, Mary Hanafin, Brian Cowan, Noel Dempsey and Dermot Ahern.

Messrs Hanafin, Dempsey and Ahern are all fairly slim, Mary Coughlan is fairly large and Mary Harney and Biffo Cowan could both be described as Heavyweights - perhaps even qualifying for the super-heavyweight division.

Being overweight (ok, fat) myself and having been caught in lift situations - either it refuses to leave the level you boarded at or gets stuck between floors - I know what goes through the mind of the heavier occupants in those circumstances. A sneaky look at the wall plate, installed in every lift, which details the maximum occupancy - expressed both in number of people and total weight e.g. 12 people, 1,000 Kg.

You then do a quick, silent count of the number of bodies with you in the lift and whether they look light, average or heavy. Then your mind forms the question that you don’t want to consider: “is it me?”

Poor Mary Harney must have had an embarrassing time in that lift yesterday. For she certainly wasn’t the only one in there wondering if it was her.

What's a "work to rule" in 21st century?

Madam, - So the INO thinks that refusing to take patient-related phone calls or input patient information into a computer system constitutes a "work to rule"? What century is the INO living in? The union appears to be working on the assumption that the public purse is bottomless, that the politicians will buckle with the election looming and that patients make excellent hostages.

Nurses certainly have a right to refuse to work overtime, but the HSE should make it clear to the INO that the current actions go well beyond a "work to rule" and that salary penalties may be applied to staff who refuse to carry out normal daily activities. Any patient deaths which result from the current "work to rule" should be the subject of proceedings for criminal negligence. - Yours, etc,

Footnote: Published as a letter in the Irish Times.

Boston, Berlin or Paris?

Is the Government sending a signal to the nursing organisations that, if they take their claim through bench-marking, a “nod & wink” way will be found to finesse it through the process? “You’ll get your money but we have to be seen to do it through agreed channels”.

This must not be allowed to happen. Bench-marking has already proved to be an expensive waste of public money, with large salary increases paid out for little, if any, reform of public services or added value for money delivered to the public. It is now widely accepted that the public service is overpaid, relative to those working in equivalent private employments. Those public service salary and pension commitments will be a severe financial burden on the state whenever the economy suffers a downturn.

Former PD leader Mary Harney suggested we should adopt the Boston rather than the Berlin economic model? Instead, on her coalition watch, we seem to have ended up with some of the most expensive parts of the Paris model. There the “fonctionnaires”, the public sector employees, really do rule the roost. Their large numbers, relatively high salaries, short working weeks, long holidays, early retirement options and generous pensions are bankrupting France. That country will also need to implement a bench-marking process, but this one will inevitably mean painful cutbacks in public sector conditions of employment.

We need to stop bench-marking being simply a gravy train before further damage is done here. Doubtless there are groups within the nursing population who merit salary increases or allowances above the norm, but there should be no blanket settlement simply to buy industrial peace, or allay the fears of nervous Government TDs in the run-up to the election.

Footnote: Aired on RTE's Today with Pat Kenny programme (minus the french paragraph). Published as a a letter by the Irish Examiner & the Irish Independent. A variant, which included politicians as recipients of bench-marking but left out specific reference to the nurses dispute, published by the Irish Times.

What's Ireland in french?

Irish Times correspondent Lara Marlowe was recently the guest of Eamon Dunphy on his Saturday morning radio show.

When he asked her how Ireland was viewed by the French, she provided the wonderfully apt and descriptive response: “capitalisme sauvage”.

It's time to face down the nurses.

Nurses are routinely portrayed as angels by the media. No politician or media commentator has dared to seriously question their “caring” status or their entitlement to greater rewards.
But is it becoming clearer by the day that they are just as intent on screwing as much as possible for themselves out of the public purse as any other group in the country.

The current row with the Cork midwives is a case in point - despite denials from Liam Doran and the INO, it’s clear that a sweetener of between €3k - €5k was expected by the personnel involved. The nurses wider claim for a 10% increase and a reduction in working hours from 38 to 35 hours per week is justified solely on the basis of relativity with hospital administrators.
Both elements have huge implications for the cost of the Health Service e.g. would the lost hours be made up through overtime or extra staff?

It’s easy to see the interminable cost spiral which such relativity claims are likely to create, if acceded to.

One can at least understand some of the motivation behind the nurses claim: it’s human nature - they’re working daily cheek by jowl with overpaid doctors and consultants, who are all either current or future millionaires. It’s natural that they should also want to get more of the gravy.

The A&E situation is the best propaganda weapon available to the nurses and one that Liam Doran and the INO ruthlessly exploits to their advantage. What percentage of the total nursing population actually works in A&E Departments? Would it be more than 2-3%? But the rest of them can piggyback their pay and working hours claims on the highly publicised stress and working conditions of that minority.

Yet we constantly hear stories of filthy wards and toilets, absence of personal hygiene by nurses moving from patient to patient etc etc.. Many tasks which were traditionally carried out by nurses are now considered to be beneath them - “someone else’s job” - and the consequences for patient care include the spread of MRSA and other hospital infections.

The paradox is that the more we pay these medical staff, the less of them we can afford to employ. We cannot continue to simply pour more money into a dysfunctional health system when all we seem to achieve is enhanced salaries rather than enhanced services.

Tallaght Strategy needed for Health

PARTIES MUST GET TOGETHER OVER HEALTH

There are two essential requirements for a high-quality, value for money Health Service: political agreement on a clearly defined, long-term strategy and operational competence in implementing that strategy. While ongoing political oversight will be required, there should be no political interference in day-to-day operational decisions.

Current political uncertainty about long-term Health Strategy and the role and authority of the HSE can only serve to undermine efforts to resolve existing disputes and reform the overall structures, in order to deliver a better service and extract more value for money from the system.

Could the main parties agree a "Tallaght Strategy" approach for Health? While this would require a squaring of the ideological circles between the main parties in order to agree an overarching long-term strategy, our political leaders need to acknowledge that almost any compromise strategy, implemented effectively, would probably deliver more value for money and better public service than the existing chaotic system.

With only two months to go to the general election, the alternative coalition is threatening, if elected, to overturn a key element of the current Government‘s strategy - the co-location of Public and Private hospitals on existing public sites. From its inception, the HSE has been plagued by ongoing political interference in key operational matters e.g. the Government obliged the HSE to retain all the existing staff of the 11 health boards instead of achieving significant economies through the amalgamation. The HSE is charged with negotiation of new contracts with the consultants, but it is very clear that the cabinet is still calling the shots.

In parallel, the vested interests will continue to exploit the confusion in order to pursue their own narrow interests and extract the maximum amount of money from the seemingly bottomless public purse.

Any downturn in the economy will leave the rest of us with the heavy burden of an overstaffed, overpaid, under-delivering public service - further limiting the funds available for the health service in future.

In the national interest, we urgently need a coherent long-term health strategy which enjoys cross-party support.

Footnote: Published today as a a letter in the Irish Independent.

The Actor plays shy

This morning’s guest on Eamon Dunphy’s couch is Stephen Rea, the Belfast actor who’s currently appearing in “Kicking a Dead Horse” by Sam Shepard at the Peacock Theatre in Dublin (to mixed reviews).

As usual, Dunphy is obsequious to a fault and greets his guest with “I know you don’t like doing interviews” and expresses his fawning thanks to his microphone shy guest.

This would be the same reluctant interviewee who I spotted while channel-hopping last night - he was on Podge & Rodge - hardly the perfect spot for the shy guest. I also recall an long interview on some other RTE radio programme during the week where he talked at length about his acting background and involvement with Brian Friel and the Field Day theatre company.

Reluctant interviewee, my arse.

A new Golden Age for Irish football?

It is just possible that “Stan” Staunton may turn out to be the most successful Irish football manager ever. I base this assessment on the strength of Eamon Dunphy’s condemnation of the man’s management capabilities.

Jack Charlton was previously the object of most contempt from our football pundit, but was also our most successful manager ever, getting us to two World Cup Finals (Italy 1990 & USA 1994) and one European Final (Germany 1988). Next in line for Dunphy’s vitriol was Mick McCarthy, who got us to the 2002 World Cup Finals in Japan/Korea.

Now Staunton is most definitely in the firing line, with Dunphy admitting that he’d hoped Ireland would lose to Wales so that the manager would be fired. If history repeats itself, we might be at the start of a golden era for Irish football.

Footnote: Published as a letter in the Irish Independent.

Another New Dawn in NI

A lot of “historic” hype in the media coverage of yesterday’s agreement between the DUP and Sinn Fein. It reminded me of the day the Good Friday Agreement was finally signed, after days & nights of “will they, won’t they? “ coverage. That was 9 years ago and I had tears in my eyes back then, but not this time around.

Let’s wait and see what happens in May - I hope the assembly gets up and running, but there’s no guarantee that DUP and Sinn Fein can actually work constructively together. My reservations were strengthened by the appearance of Gregory Campbell, DUP MP & MLA, on RTE’s Questions & Answers last night, a special edition broadcast from Belfast.

Campbell was quick to make the point that Northern Ireland Secretary, Peter Hain, must be busy wiping the egg from his face after the DUP had shown him that he wouldn’t impose deadlines on them. Thankfully, John Bowman firmly pointed out to Campbell that the deferral of devolution had only been accepted by the British Government on the basis that the DUP had been forced to negotiate this deal, very publicly, with their arch-enemies Sinn Fein.

Campbell is from the anti-power sharing wing of the DUP and is tipped for ministerial office, along with Nigel Dodds, as Paisley seeks to maintain unity within his party. However, Campbell’s contribution last night is typical of the long-standing DUP approach to politics: it is not sufficient to defeat your opponent, you must also seek to humiliate him publicly as well.

Does this augur well for the type of working relationships necessary to make a devolved NI government successful? I don’t think so.

Shane Ross and Sir Anthony

Another set of annual results from Independent News & Media gets the usual fawning coverage from Shane Ross in today‘s Sunday independent.

Ross likes to portray himself as the scourge of the business community but is routinely the brown-nosed boy when it comes to the interests of Sir Anthony.

In today’s article, Ross lauds the performance of the group’s media interests in South Africa, Australasia and India and tells readers that “this is not vanity expansion”.

However, he makes no mention of the company’s UK interests where the London Independent continues to lose millions each year. Now that’s what you could classify as a “vanity expansion”, unless shareholders consider it a fair price to pay for a knighthood.

Put a Cork in it

What is it about Cork people that makes many of them believe the rest of the country is envious of them when, in fact, the feeling is more often one of genuine dislike? And with good cause.

When then Minister for Transport Seamus Brennan promised that Cork Airport would be granted independence from Dublin on a debt-free basis, the local cute hoors decided to pull a fast one. Thinking they had been handed a blank cheque, they went ahead and built a Taj Mahal of a terminal at enormous expense. Now they’re bleating about being asked to pay about half the cost of their gold-plated white elephant.

Today we have Roy Keane claiming an anti-Cork bias, simply because one of his Sunderland players hasn’t been included in the Irish football squad. Perhaps it's just a wise precaution on Stan's part, given that a Corkman walked out on his country at a critical time a couple of years ago. Forgotten about that one, have you Roy?

Whingeing langers, the lot of them!

Footnote: Published as a letter in the Irish Independent but, sadly, they edited out the two best bits of the attack, those in italics above. A modified version, ending "Cork should just get over it" published by the Irish Examiner.

Timing for life

We constantly hear about female-specific cancers, but little or nothing is said about the large number of men who die each year from prostate and testicular cancers. Now, Ronan Keating is fronting a radio advertising campaign to raise awareness of these male problems.

One of the symptoms of prostate cancer is trouble having a pee, often manifested by repeated visits to the loo at night for men. When you get up in the middle of the night, you’re a bit dozy and it’s difficult to assess just how productive, or otherwise, your pee session has been in those circumstances.

Bat recently asked me why I had installed a wall clock in the loo. I explained that I wanted to time my pees, in order to have an early warning system for the onset of the dreaded prostate cancer. “But it’s got no second hand” he protested.

So?

Prick-Lit

Susan McKay, formerly the Sunday Tribune’s much respected NI correspondent, was a guest on “The View” tonight, RTE’s weekly arts, film and book review programme. Discussing a new novel by Kevin Major titled “No Man’s Land” she described it as “prick lit”.

Harold Robbins, who might claim to have been a pathfinder in that particular genre, might well be annoyed that he wasn’t accorded this accolade during his long career. It’s good for the boys to finally have something to counter the “chick lit” revolution.

I’m still smiling.

Betting ups & downs.

Cheltenham was proving a relatively expensive 4-days of tv gambling, until Kauto Star obliged in the Gold Cup on Friday, the final day of the festival. A double with Denman yielded about €130 which reduced my overall losses to about €50.

Since then a couple of obscure bets have restored liquidity to my online bookie accounts. €45 won on Ireland v. Pakistan was followed by €150 won on Vijay Singh on Sunday. What’s that old joke about him marrying Nick Faldo’s former caddy, Fanny?

Flying the flag for Ireland.

Report from the brother-in-law that no Irish flag flew over Stadio Flaminio in Rome this weekend. Instead, we were represented by a new flag featuring the crests of the four provinces, to accompany the rugby anthem “Ireland’s Call“.

If true, this development may not go down too well in GAA HQ, never mind the 800-year men around the country.

I’ll await an eye-witness report from our own 800-year man who was at the match in Rome. However, if deprived of both the national anthem and the tricolour, he may well have expired in a fit of nationalism.

Ryanair 1c flights

Aired by Pat Kenny on RTE radio today:

Pat,
Ref your earlier discussion about Aer Lingus/Ryanair average fares. Those cheap Ryanair flights look great on paper, until you factor in all the incidental costs. The wife and I are just back from 5 nights in Biarritz, which all began with a bargain Ryanair booking - 4 x1c each way Ryanair flights.

With online banking I can now see all the relevant hits on our credit card:

With additional charges, that Ryanair 4c runs up to €82.
€51 - parking at Dublin airport.
€30 - taxis from and to Biarritz airport.
€550 - 5 nights B&B in Biarritz.
€620 - meals, including wine
€610 - misc shopping - a bag, shoes, belt, top, cosmetics etc..(all female)
€280 - misc/unaccounted cash spent on beer etc

That’s a grand total of about €2,225, all starting with 4 x Ryanair "1c" flights. What’s the reverse of "from little acorns ......"?

Incidentally, the average price of a pint (watching the rugby) was €7 - the Shelbourne is looking cheap!

Regards, etc

PS - if you air this, please don’t use my name - the wife would kill me!

What we need from Scotland

Assuming that Ireland can beat Italy on Paddy’s Day in Rome, we need to win by a margin that’s 5 points greater than that by which France beat Scotland in Paris on the same day, if we‘re to win the 6 Nations Championship.

It seems to me that Scotland’s best two backs so far this year, by a considerable margin, have been Chris Paterson and Shaun Lamont, who have both been stuck out on the wings.

I’d recommend that Frank Hadden plays Paterson at outhalf and Lamont in the centre if he wants to create scoring chances for the Scottish backline. Lamont has also been a highly effective tackler, so moving him to the centre should also improve the defensive line in that critical area.

I don’t know what alternative talent they have available to fill-in on the wings, but playing your best two backs at the extremities seems a policy that’s likely to minimise returns.

Left is right

As we’re reminded by the old rhyming couplet, “coughs and sneezes spread diseases”. Consequently, we’re taught to cover our mouths when we need to cough or catch a sneeze (literally!). Most of us do this with our right hand, the same hand that we proffer for a handshake.

This has been the topic of discussion in some catholic churches, where the “sign of peace” is a handshake offered to one’s neighbours during the course of a mass. Some people are reluctant to share germs with strangers, particularly during the winter months when mass is often accompanied by a cacophony of coughing throughout the service.

The solution is relatively simple - we need to retrain ourselves to cover our mouths with our LEFT hand when we cough or sneeze. While we’re at it, we could add arse-wiping, willy-shaking and nose-picking to the list of activities for the left hand.

Could I have cracked the MRSA dilemma?

Eating for Ireland

In France recently I was reminded of the old admonition to “have breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a pauper”.

Here in Ireland people tend to have a small breakfast, grab a sandwich for lunch and then eat a big plateful of whatever you’re having yourself, plus spuds, for dinner - before flopping down on the couch to watch tv for the night. Particularly those unfortunates who spend a couple of hours each day commuting to and from work.

The essential purpose of food is to provide fuel for the body to perform tasks. We’re running on close to empty during the day when we’re actually burning fuel, then we fill the tank in the evening when we go into couch potato mode. This allows time for the body to maximise the extraction and storage of fat from that heavy evening meal, as generally little or nothing is being burnt off through physical activity.

In France & Spain, breakfast tends to be coffee & bread/croissant, but lunch is a substantial meal and one which most people ensure they sit down and eat. Every city, town & village has a host of small restaurants to cater for this demand, and they all provide excellent value at lunchtime.

You’ll see the blackboard outside announcing today’s “Formule Midi” or “Menu del Dia”, usually a couple of courses for no more than €10 - €12. Dinner is often eaten much later in the evening and portions are usually smaller than those eaten at lunchtime. Hence, Paddy on holidays is often starving after dinner there as he’s just had the portion equivalent of a snack, instead of his usual large plate of grub at night.

The old “country “ habit of having your dinner in the middle of the day was our equivalent of eating in the continental way. Though sneered at now by our city sophisticates, who would regard it as peasant behaviour, it was a much healthier and logical approach to eating than our current lop-sided regime.

If we could repackage the old ways and invest them with a sense of Mediterranean/continental sophistication, it would be good for the general health of the country.

Safety on board

While in Biarritz, we bumped into a group of seven “lads” from Bective rugby club who were over on a short break. They turned up on the same Ryanair flight home as ourselves, where they paid the small fee for “priority boarding”.

When they boarded the plane, they filled one full row of the two which constitute the emergency exits over the wings - the surplus member of the party had to sit in the other emergency exit row. Their objective was to avail of the extra leg-room provided in those particular rows.

Now here’s the thing: all of these guys were in their 60’s, overweight and red-faced. They looked like classic candidates for a heart attack. In the event of a crash, some of them looked like they’d have difficulty getting their bulk out through the emergency exit, if they hadn’t already died of a heart attack from fright.

In other words, these six guys would probably have completely blocked access to 25% of the emergency exits, while their spare mate was probably doing the same in the row in front.

Surely there should be rules about just who can sit in these rows? I know I shouldn’t qualify.

Flying for Ireland

We left our hotel in Biarritz at about 10.45 am, walked around the corner to the taxi rank and headed for the airport. By 3.00 pm we were booting down the M50 to the Cherrywood exit, in order to get home in time for the Champion Hurdle at Cheltenham, race time 3.15. The task was accomplished with about 5 minutes to spare. I’d a small bet on Hardy Eustace, who could only finish 4th, but it was great to watch the race live.

That must be the guts of 1,000 miles travelled in less than half a day. How blasé we’ve become, we just take it all for granted, yet that 1,000 miles might be the cumulative total of several years, perhaps even a lifetime, travel for our great-grandparents.

Still, with this Global Warming debate heating up, cheap air travel may soon be a thing of the past, taxed out of existence by the rising power of the Greens. I’ve devised a new slogan for them for the upcoming general election, but I suspect they’ll pass on it - this time around.

“We have ways of making you walk!”

No-one expects the Spanish Inquisition!

I smile at the memory of Monty Python's piss-take on the Spanish Inquisition.

However a book review in this week’s Sunday Times suggests that the Inquisition may have been relative wimps when compared with the secular courts of the day. The review of “The Roman Catholic Church: An Illustrated History” by Edward Norman, reveals that only 1% of those who appeared before the Inquisition tribunals received the death penalty.

With the Inquisition, if you repented your heresy, you were given a penance. In the secular courts, if you stole a sheep and repented you were still hanged. And that was still the case into the early 19th century!

The book reviewer, Eamon Duffy, tells us that “Norman has always specialised in deconstructing the conventional pieties of liberal opinion, and this talent is entertainingly on display in his treatment of the medieval conflicts of Christianity and Islam, and that bête noire of all left-thinking people, the Inquisition. Moorish Spain has, he thinks, been romanticised: “all those placid courtyards and sparkling fountains, that poetry and art,” depended on “one of the largest slave populations the world has ever seen”: the Emir of Cordova in the 10th century maintained a harem of “6,000 women and 13,000 young boys”, and Moorish society never evolved the representative institutions, the judicial system or the concepts of individual liberty that would be the legacy of medieval Christendom. Hence “it is not surprising that Spanish Christians found Moorish moral standards defective, nor that they should have sought what is now termed regime change”. “

Ergo, the Spanish Inquisition was a good thing. Bet you weren’t expecting that!

A woman's right to choose?

Today’s Irish Times features the latest in their new “Head 2 Head” pieces, this one on the topic “Should gay and lesbian couples be allowed to adopt children?”.

Quite apart from the usual argument as to whether it’s better for the child to have a father & mother rather than a two fathers or two mothers, a major underlying concern among the straight population is undoubtedly one of uncertainty regarding the “nature or nurture” aspect of this particular topic.

Obviously, the best interests of the child must be paramount, as already decreed by existing adoption law. This shouldn’t be a social experiment, driven in part by the need to be politically correct or overly considerate of the feelings of either side in the debate. Let the science prevail.

It will be interesting to see how this adoption issue intersects with the debate around the proposed constitutional amendment to enshrine the rights of the child in the constitution. Already there are signs that this will create potential conflicts with the rights of parents and protections of the family currently enshrined in the constitution.

When it comes to the “rights of the child”, the real elephant in the room will be the question of whether these should be superseded by the “woman’s right to choose”, as they routinely seem to be at present?

At present, in sexual/reproductive matters, “the woman’s right to choose” seems to broadly cover four main options:

(a) To have sex, or not.
(b) To use contraception, or not.
(c) To have her baby fathered by a long-term partner, or not
(d) To have an abortion, or not.

I’m fully in agreement with a woman’s right to choose for Options (a) & (b) above and, if her rights under those headings have been denied, to have the rights outlined under Options (c) & (d).

However, in the context of the rights of the child being specifically enshrined in the constitution , should the child’s rights be pre-eminent in consideration of Options (c) & (d), other than in the circumstances outlined in the previous paragraph?

According to Treoir, the group representing unmarried parents, over 20,000 babies are born each year in Ireland to unmarried parents (that's about one-third of all babies), and 25% of these have no father's name on the birth certificate. In addition, it's generally accepted that over 5,000 women travel abroad each year for abortions.

Who will argue the case that many of those babies born to unmarried mothers, plus all those babies aborted, would not have better life prospects if adopted by a loving gay couple in a long-term, stable relationship?

This could be a long and heated debate.

Footnote: An edited version published as a letter in the Irish Examiner.

Tiling Dublin 4

Noel O’Gara featured again on RTE’s Today with Pat Kenny as he’s just set up a tile market in Dartmouth Square. He got a rough time from some of the programme’s listeners, particularly some naïve but rude comments about his being a red-neck with no empathy for Dublin.

The reality is that he’s just a property speculator who somehow managed to get his hands on a valuable piece of real estate at a knock-down price and he’s determined to maximise his financial gain.

To that end, he’ll do whatever he can to annoy the local population in order to ensure that local politicians pressurise the council to get this sorted out as quickly as possible. He is also, through his car-parking and tile market ventures and by talking up the possibility of apartment blocks, seeking to demonstrate the commercial value of the property when it comes to be assessed under a CPO process.

Frankly, I find it a bit rich for the politicians to be criticising O‘Gara. After all, our Dáil occupants have converted Leinster Lawn into a surface carpark for their own private use for the past several years, an act of public vandalism which is in blatant contravention of the same local planning guidelines which were used in Court to stop O'Gara operating Dartmouth Square as a car-park.

What I’d like to know is how he came to hear about the Dartmouth Square property and how he managed to buy it at such a knockdown price. Any more cheap public parks coming up in the near future?

Lies, damn lies and statistics

So Irish schools are ranked close to the bottom of an EU-wide league table for the provision of physical education (PE) classes, according to a new EU report. The report also notes that despite the recommended Department of Education guideline of 60 minutes per week, PE is not taught in some Irish primary schools. Quality of provision of PE also varies, with research showing three-quarters of classes last less than 30 minutes.

This is interesting in the light of a Dáil Exchange at Leaders Questions last Wednesday. FG leader Enda Kenny questioned Taoiseach Bertie Ahern about the level of drug experimentation among children aged 15 and under. Apparently, Ireland was ranked 4th worst overall and worst among girls in that age group in an International survey.

Bertie’s response was to criticise those who picked up on these negative statistics, while ignoring other aspects of that survey which portrayed a more positive aspect of Irish youth. As an example, he cited a finding that Irish children were ranked among the most active in that same survey - the implication being that this was as a result of Government policy in this area - compensating in some way for their lack of action/success in the under-age drugs scene.

Now we can see that whatever success is being achieved on the “activity” scale, it has nothing to do with Government policy.

Digging Jim Reeves

Bat's Cat - beginning to look like him! And has stopped moving too.

Wimbledon Wimmen

Wimbledon has decided to award identical prize money to men and women at this year’s championship. There has been some debate about the fact that men compete over 5 sets, while women compete over 3 sets. Presumably this is historical and relates to the perceived physical differences between the sexes.

However, is a 40% differential appropriate and would women’s tennis benefit, as a spectator sport, if there was a greater emphasis on the physical endurance aspect of sporting performance?

A brief look at other sports suggests that this 40% differential may well be too large:

Track & Field - the average performance differential for middle distance events e.g. 1500, 5000 & 10000 metres, among elite athletes is about 15% - ditto the marathon. In high & long jumps it’s about 20%.
Swimming - the difference in world record times for all Freestyle distances between 50m and 800m ranges between 10% - 15%.
Golf - Ladies play 18 holes of golf - the ladies tees generally reduce distance by no more than 20%, often less.
Equestrian - ladies compete on an equal footing with men in show-jumping, 3-day eventing and there are even a small number of successful lady jockeys riding professionally against the men e.g. Nina Carberry.

All this suggests that the gap between men and women in tennis should be reduced to a maximum of 20%.

Bearing in mind that there needs to be an uneven number of sets in order to ensure a winner, this could be achieved by either increasing the number of games in each of the existing 3 sets or, preferably, making it the best of 5 sets with the number of games in each set reduced e.g. first to 5 games with a two-game lead.

Those funny Shinners

The Sinn Féin Ard-Fheis has passed a motion to re-name Merrion Road, home of the British Embassy, as Bobby Sands Avenue. That’ll please the owners of the mansions along that up-market road, as it would undoubtedly knock large lumps off the value of their homes.

While they’re at it, presumably the Shinners will also re-name Parnell Sq, where the party's HQ is located. Murdering Bastards Place would seem apt.

Sleeveenism - O'Toole v. McDowell

In his Irish Times column of Feb 27th, Fintan O’Toole defined “sleeveenism” as “a combination of cunning and cowardice, the sly use of low tricks to avoid facing up to a potentially difficult situation.”

O’Toole went on to accuse Michael McDowell and the PDs of “an act of supreme sleeveenism” with regard to the Labour Party’s proposed Civil Unions Bill. To wit, the Minister for Justice’s proposal “not that the bill be rejected, but that its reading be postponed for six months. Six months from now, of course, there will be a new Dáil and all motions left over from the old Dáil will lapse. The effect of the McDowell amendment is to consign the Civil Unions Bill to oblivion without anyone having to actually vote against it. Fianna Fáil and PD TDs can go to the doorsteps, tell gay people that they support their right to equality and tell social conservatives that they sunk an attempt to recognise gay partnerships.”

In his defence, published in today's Irish Times, Michael McDowell states that “it would be a mistake and politically dishonest to accept the Labour Bill. It would be especially wrong to do so in the context of legal advice that the central scheme of the Labour Party Bill was unconstitutional.”

If Michael McDowell felt so strongly about the demerits of the Labour bill, he should have voted against it, rather than kicking it into limbo. Regardless of which man is correct on the legal argument, I believe that the charge of political sleeveenism has been proven, based on the defendant’s own testimony.

I rest my case.

Footnote: Published as a letter in the Irish Times.